Presence: The Yoga of Relationships

Valentine’s day is a few weeks away. It’s one of my absolute favorite holidays because for me giving and receiving love is perhaps the most important thing in my life. I love the fact that there’s a day dedicated just to luuuuuuv. (Cue the Barry White)
 
One of my favorite Valentine’s Days happened a few years ago. Seneca and I had started dating a few months previous and I was (am) so madly in love with her. I really, really, really wanted to impress her. I wanted her to melt in my arms, into a puddle of love and cooing, and kiss me all over my face. I wanted to see that look on her face she gives me when I know she’s burning for me.  Sure there’s attraction in that look, too, but there but this is something sweeter and deeper, a manifestation of rock-solid, burning-heart connection. There’s nothing like it.
 
I knew that she loves a good lasagna so I went to Tony Caputo’s and bought all the mondo-deluxe ingredients to make from scratch The Lasagna to End All Lasagnas. Why even try after this perfection of tomatoey, cheesy, and Italian spiced goodness?? It had 4 kinds of cheeses, the best pasta, veg, and spices, cooked with the finest olive oil. Damn! I was expecting a phone call offering me an honorary degree from Le Cord En Bleu. This thing was an institution!
 
I bought a nice, expensive bottle of wine, a 2011 Altamura sangiovese, a favorite of hers I’d heard her reference with a swoon.
 
Then I bought two dozen roses, one for giving and the other to use for a rose petal path around my house.
 
Then, I bought a box of chocolates and ate all the chocolate. Stay with me! I cut out like 75 or 100 little paper hearts and wrote on each one something I loved about her. “I love to hear your soft breath when you are sleeping.” “I love your beautiful smile.” “I love your amazing chocolate mouse cake.” “I love how you are such a hard worker.” “I love how you love me” “I love your beautiful heart.” “I love your hot bod!”. . .  You get the point. I gave all the hearts to Seneca in the chocolate box. This was a fantastic exercise that made me tear up several times when preparing it.

Please use this idea for your love this Valentine’s Day. For the next few weeks, start jotting down all the things, little and big, that you love about your special person.
 
I invited her over to my house and when she arrived, the house was filled with the incredible aroma of the Lasagna To End All Lasagnas. There were flowers, wine, wonderful music, all the preparations.
 
The evening was INCREDIBLE! It went off without a hitch.
 
I think the biggest success of all was the chocolate box turned into myriad Valentines. Take in that whole box and your heart gets fat, your thighs stay hot!
 
I could just be me but I think that a lot of women just want to feel like you give a shit, you know? Like you care about them enough to make a plan. It’s shows presence, an essential element that every relationship needs. Guys are the same way. When Seneca comes home with a surprise for me, something small like a nice beer she thought I might like, it melts me to know that she was thinking about me and went out of her way to buy it for me. Little things like that make me feel like she's present with me.

It's about being present and observing one another. When we are hanging out in the evening, the babe’s gone to sleep, if we have a few moments together and one or the other of us isn’t present (usually me) there’s static in the relationship. Often, I need to pull my head out (of my work) and go over, sit next to her, stroke her hair and look her in the eyes and connect. Cultivating presence in your relationship is one of the yoga of relationships.
 

Ok. So make this Valentine’s Day INCREDIBLE! Make it one that your special person won't forget. Cultivate some presence with your special person in a way that is fun, romantic, and unique. Show your person that you thought enough about them to plan a INCREDIBLE day together.
 
Check this out! Seneca and I are offering you and your special person an amazing Valentines Day retreat at Snowbird Cliff Spa. Either Saturday February 13 or Sunday February 14 10 am to 4 pm. ALL COUPLES ARE WELCOME. We've figured out the details. You just need to show up.
 
Share your love with your person by having tons of fun, laughing, getting to know each other even deeper, connecting, learning ninja-like heart connection techniques, and relaxing together in the world-renown Cliff Spa.
 

Yes, it’s going to be held at the legendary Snowbird Cliff Spa and access to the spa is included! We’ll do some fun partner yoga, appropriate and fun for all levels and experience—even if you’re a newbie. We will also do some wonderful, relaxing couples poses, an opportunity to stretch and open each other up comfortably. This will lead to the part where together you’ll give and receive a long, decadent partner massage. Knowing the technique, you can offer this to your partner when they’ve had a long day. This will help to continue to build your relationship with regular presence and intimacy.
 

One of the things I’m really excited about is practicing some mindfulness, breathing, and presence exercises together. This will literally breathe life into your relationship. We'll learn and practice some cool, esoteric, and very specialized yoga techniques to help build anextraordinary connection with your partner. You’ll feel your heart swell and feel more connected to your partner than you thought possible through these simple yet profound techniques.
 

There will be chocolate! There will be poetry. Great discussion. So many things for a perfectly fun day! You’ll leave feeling relaxed, connected, and in love with your special person.  
 
After it’s done, you’ll take your honey by the hand and go and get steamy in the Eucalyptus steam room, boil in the roof-top hot tub, or sit and whisper sweet nothings in the solarium. This is going to be an amazing day!
 
So, everybody is going to want to get in on this and unfortunately we can only accommodate a limited number of couples to attend each day so as to keep the experience intimate and fun. We already have several couples signed up but for the moment there is still room in both sessions.
 
This will sell out soon so please reserve your spot today!
 
Basic Deets:
February 13 or 14
Snowbird Cliff Spa
10 am to 4 pm with a lunch break
$250 per couple.