I’m taking on an important subject: Tending to the Subtle Body, how to care for your energy to avoid feeling depleted, defeated, and dark and to keep you feeling alive, awake, and actionable.
Today, I’m talking about how the quality of friends you keep often dictates the quality of energy you keep.
We all know that there’s the family we are born to and the family we choose. Our chosen family, our dearest friends, can be a source of incredible love and support, and can help us to evolve into the people we are destined to become.
But friendships can also deplete our energy, deteriorate our character, and leave us feeling terrible.
Who are the friends that you spend the most time with and how do you feel while you’re with them?
How do you feel after you’ve spent time with them?
Do they tend to bring out the best or worst in you?
Qualities of Friends
High-vibe friends:
Are optimistic
Speak well of others
Point out the positive
Explore possibilities
Build each other up
See the best in people
Listen well
Are grateful
Are sincere
Radiate love
Are visionary
Bring out the best in each other
See and understand each others greatest strengths and encourage each other to reach toward greater horizons
Make each other want to be a better person
Leave each other feeling great
Are adaptable
Are growth-oriented
Low-vibe friends:
Complain
Gossip
Are fearful
Worry
Focus on problems
Jokingly tear each other down
See the worst in people
Are poor listeners
Are sarcastic
Feel like victims
Addicted to drama
Are jealous
Are rigid, not adaptable
Love to commiserate
Of course, no friend is going to be all sunshine and rainbows all the time, nor will they always be only doom and gloom. That said, it’s important to ask yourself how you feel when regularly spending time with them and how it might be affecting your energy.
It’s also true that good friends support each other when things are tough. You don’t need to abandon friends who are going through tough times or worry that you’re not a good friend when you are going through tough times.
Instead, when things are tough, rather than wallowing in the mud together, good friends help to support each other, hold a space for healing and grief, and help each other remember their innate strength and capacity to move forward and become stronger in the process.
For example, when a friend is complaining about something, a good friend might say something like, “I know you to be so expert at meeting these kinds of situations with grace and patience. I know you can do this with this situation as well. How can I help?”
Also, it’s important to examine and reevaluate friendships that are based solely on going through tough times.
Some straight talk.
Are you a good friend?
Check out the list of qualities for being a high-vibe friend vs. a low-vibe friend and determine those areas where you really shine and those spots where you can practice being a better friend.
Practice being the kind of friend who raises the vibe for the entire friendship and invite your friends to join you in your efforts.
If you have friendships, maybe even life-long friendships, that no longer bring out the best in each other, you might need to revolutionize those friendships with an intervention, a serious talk, or maybe even a breakup. Sometimes it’s necessary to limit your exposure to certain friends, even if just for a while, while still retaining a spirit of love and support from afar.
Invitation:
Challenge yourself and your group of friends to practice high-vibe friendships
Give yourself a 7-day challenge to either not gossip or not complain or both!
Expand your group of friends and seek out positive people with whom you can share bringing out each other's best.
Tell me what you think about this idea of tending to your subtle body by the company you keep.